Your visit is important to us.

Unfortunately, all operators are currently talking to friends, loved ones, and of course,  people wo are more important than you, overall.

Please wait patiently and watch the future burn on the screen.

Are you feeling tired?

Please purchase a ShowerToaster and have an exciting “safe and effective” exit strategy completion.

Still there? I just wanted to say, we will never get around to answering your questions or complaints…

If you are desperately in need of service or assistance, please keep in mind that ShowerToaster will solve all your problems.

Please Click the Van Lawn Logo to return to that site where you will still be ignored.